Divorce seems to follow trends like many aspects and areas of life. March and August are the most common months for finalizing a divorce, but January has been known as the divorce month for many years. Regardless of which month your Michigan divorce is finalized, you’ll be facing your first post-divorce holiday season sooner or later. Fortunately, there are a few effective tips for not only surviving it but also thriving.
Avoid Isolation
It may seem like the best decision is just to stay away from anyone after your divorce, but that’s the worst thing you can do. Once alone, the thoughts and emotions team up and can cause intense anxiety and lead to horrible decisions. Obviously, stay away from your ex, their family, and even mutual friends. Nevertheless, rely on your support system during the holidays to get you out and about while helping you enjoy the season.
Set New Expectations and Traditions
It doesn’t matter if you were married 15 months or 15 years, that first post-divorce holiday is going to be different. This is especially the case when kids are involved. Discuss traditions with the kids and see which ones they want to keep. Then simply build new options, expectations, and traditions around them. Consider volunteering options to keep everyone busy and to remember still have plenty of blessings.
Share the Kids
If you have kids, a workable custody arrangement should be in place for the holidays to avoid playing tug-of-war with the little ones and your emotions. But even if your ex is playing games, be the bigger person and share the kids. Post-divorce holidays are hard on kids, but having two holidays can be quite exciting. So why not play it up even more? Schedule your own holiday with them before or after they spend it with the other parent. Still prepare their favorite treats, decorate, have some classic and some new traditions, and provide a few festive surprises. Always keep communication open with the ex, arrange drop-offs and pick-ups in neutral places, and encourage the kids to have fun.
Take a Sabbatical and a Vacation
There are hundreds of social media platforms online, but Facebook still leads the pack with almost 2.25 billion active monthly users. Let’s face it, those sites aren’t used to share the bad or negative life moments, they’re used to boast, connect, and keep up with the Joneses… or your cheerleading co-captain you haven’t seen in 17 years. Chances are, you’re also connected to your ex, their family members, mutual friends, and possibly even their co-workers. So take a break. Pull out of social media for a while. Go quiet and disconnect for a few weeks or a few months, whatever it takes to re-balance. Moreover, if that’s not enough, take a vacation. Various cruises and tour options can be booked focusing around a number of life interests ranging from single connections to fitness improvement.
Dive into New Resolutions
Maybe you can’t afford to take a cruise or plan a whole new holiday, but that doesn’t mean you can’t dive into new resolutions early. Divorce is a time for new personal discovery and reinvention. It’s time to focus on yourself. So why not change that hair, apply for a better position in the company, fix those chipped or crooked teeth once and for all, and join a gym or at least pull up some workouts on YouTube? If you’re confused about where to start, be sure to ask your Michigan divorce lawyer for suggestions. They’re just a call away.
